If you only had 2 hours left to live and wanted to watch a film (although as much as I love films I would probably think of something better to do with those last precious moments) for pete's sake DON'T watch these.
The Goonies
on DVD
(1985) Starring:Sean Astin, Josh Brolin, Corey Feldman Director:Richard Donner Certificate:
A thrill-a-minute adventure film. When brothers Mikey (Sean Astin) and Brand (Josh Brolin) learn that greedy developers are forcing their family to move, they and their friends decide to have one last, precious adventure together. With the help of a treasure map they've found in the attic, the ..read more »
Poor acting and you didn't care about the characters or the ape. Another remake of a classic original that should have been left well alone.
King Kong
on DVD
(2005) Starring:Naomi Watts, Adrien Brody, Jack Black Director:Peter Jackson Certificate:
It is 1933, and vaudeville actress Ann Darrow (Oscar nominee Naomi Watts) has found herself - like so many other New Yorkers during the Great Depression - without the means to earn a living. Unwilling to compromise and allow herself to sink into a career in burlesque, she considers her limited ..read more »
Another in a line of bad Ben Affleck flicks. Very loosely based around the bombing of Pearl Harbor...very loosely indeed.
Pearl Harbor
on DVD
(2001) Starring:Ben Affleck, Kate Beckinsale, Jon Voight Director:Michael Bay Certificate:
Director Michael Bay (ARMAGEDDON, THE ROCK) uses a tragic romantic triangle to set the stage for the infamous Japanese attack on Pearl Harbor in this epic tale of love, loss, and patriotism. When Evelyn (Kate Beckinsale), a beautiful Navy nurse, meets dashing ace Army fighter pilot Rafe (Ben ..read more »
Face/Off
on DVD
(1997) Starring:John Travolta, Nicolas Cage, Joan Allen Director:John Woo Certificate:
The ordeal of super-heroic, singularly dedicated FBI agent Sean Archer (John Travolta – BLOW OUT, SATURDAY NIGHT FEVER) is only beginning after finally capturing his arch nemesis, Castor Troy (Nicolas Cage – WILD AT HEART, NATIONAL TREASURE), an elusive, maniacal terrorist who claimed the life of ..read more »
Please, please why mess around and set it in the US and add all American characters. I ask you !! At least they left the mini's alone.
The Italian Job
on DVD
(2003) Starring:Mark Wahlberg, Charlize Theron, Edward Norton Director:F. Gary Gray Certificate: Watch now: £2.49
In this wholly refreshing remake of the 1969 crime classic starring Michael Caine and Noel Coward, Mark Wahlberg stars as Charlie Croker, a smooth thief who orchestrates a flawless heist in Venice with the help of his mentor, safecracker John Bridger (Donald Sutherland). Together with his cronies--..read more »
Where do you start with this beauty ? Kevin Costner can't do an English accent, and even the REAL English (bit parts I might add) have some of the worse forced accents imaginable. Do Americans really think we all sound like Werzle Gummage ?
Robin Hood Prince Of Thieves
on DVD
(1991) Starring:Kevin Costner, Morgan Freeman, Christian Slater Director:Kevin Reynolds Certificate:
Robin of Locksley escapes death in a foreign land. Returning home to England with a Moor named Azeem he discovers that his father has been killed by the Sheriff of Nottingham who has seized power in the King's absence. Now Robin must become a fugitive and fight for retribution.
Ding dong. Who's that at the door ? It's Mr Coster no less. Who cares ?
The Postman
on DVD
(1997) Starring:Kevin Costner, Will Patton, Olivia Williams Director:Kevin Costner Certificate:
In a post-apocalyptic, totally anarchic America, circa 2013, a defector from the ranks of murderous despot General Bethlehem masquerades as a representative of the good old U.S. Postal Service. But his ruse so delights the weary, oppressed people he meets that it indeed becomes real--and he finds ..read more »
Ah. Kevin again. Good idea for a film, what with global warming and everything, but the plot was...well there was no plot really. Just peppered with more bad acting by Costner and Co.
Waterworld
on DVD
(1995) Starring:Kevin Costner, Dennis Hopper, Jeanne Tripplehorn Director:Kevin Reynolds Certificate:
Let's be honest: this 1995 epic isn't nearly as bad as its negative publicity led us to expect. At the time, Waterworld was the most expensive Hollywood production in history (it had a Titanic-sized 200 million US dollars budget), and the film arrived in cinemas with so much controversy and ..read more »
The Wicker Man
on DVD
(2006) Starring:Nicolas Cage, Ellen Burstyn, Molly Parker Director:Neil LaBute Certificate: Watch now: £2.49
Neil LaBute's THE WICKER MAN stars Nicholas Cage as Edward Malus, a policeman thrust into some dangerous detective work by a series of strange events that begin with a horrific car crash. This incident leaves the cop haunted, with images of the accident replaying in his heavily medicated mind. ..read more »
The same as Jaws 1, Jaws 2 and Jaws 3. Plastic shark eats anyone (and any thing) stupid enough to go swimming after being warned time and time again. Like "The Revenge" of a bad curry (repeat after me..burp !!)
Jaws 4 - The Revenge
on DVD
(1987) Starring:Michael Caine, Lance Guest, Lorraine Gary Director:Joseph Sargent Certificate:
The now widowed Ellen Brody must re-live the horrors of the past when she moves to the Bahamas to be with her marine biologist son Michael. The nightmares start when her grand-daughter is attacked by a Great White Shark...